Left-Handed Engineers From MARZ
Christmas morning

---

Zephyr gradually became aware of movement beside him on the bed and small voices elsewhere in the house. He cracked one reluctant eye open. Reg was sitting up in bed with his glasses already on and the cat in his lap. Zephyr gazed at him for a while, taking a moment to enjoy the peace before another day of personality clashes began.

Reg's hair was starting to look a little greasy. Zephyr regretted not washing it immediately before the holiday. It'd be too much trouble to have him take a shower here; there were too many other people around, and he was sure they wouldn't be very understanding. Not that Reg couldn't take a shower by himself... he just tended to forget to get out. More frequently lately than ever, in fact. Zephyr sympathized with the tendency to think up one's best ideas in the shower; unfortunately, Reg was particularly bad at multitasking. A reasonable explanation, Zephyr thought, but not one the Muellers or his mother would accept.

So many other things needed doing, too. Reg needed new clothes and shoes and a dentist appointment. More immediately, he needed a haircut, and more immediately than that, Zephyr had to make sure he ate something today and had to keep the stress level down. Four overstimulated children could do a lot of damage, and then there was that inconvenient intolerance for the sound of ripping paper. Zephyr wished he had implored Portia and Marlone more strongly to use gift bags. They'd probably forgotten.

That was a lot of responsibility looming over his head, Zephyr realized. It was all the same stuff he usually had to deal with; only the added factor of other people bothered him. Reg really was like a big child, but that was all right. Except now Zephyr felt pressured to pretend otherwise. Reg had to seem competent and self-sufficient, even though he wasn't by any stretch of the imagination. Zephyr's mother was right, but he had to prove her wrong anyway.

But he knew he couldn't. If he tried to treat Reg differently just for show, Reg would get confused, and who knew how he'd react? If he treated Reg the way he knew he needed to, Reg would be fine, but nobody else would understand.

If only he could get them to understand. But no, that was impossible too. How could he prove Reg's worthiness when he couldn't even prove his own?

God, he despised his mother.

And in the meantime, Reg looked so blissfully content, sitting in the bed and petting 3 while he waited for Zephyr to tell him it was time to get up.

He heard Marsh stir on the floor to his left, and then the thundering of little feet on the stairs. The bedroom door crashed open and Tammy barreled into the room.

"Zephyr Zephyr Zephyr Zephyr! Come lookit what Santa brought us! C'mon c'mon!"

Zephyr slowly pulled himself up into a sitting position. 3 disappeared and broke Reg from his reverie. Tammy hung on the edge of the bed, bursting with energy. Zephyr smiled at her.

"I'll be down in a minute. I just have to get some socks on."

Tammy's eyes went wide. "Ooh! Can I see your feet?"

Damn, he should have anticipated that. "Later, Tam, okay? Go wake up your mom and I'll be there soon."

"Brit's waking Mommy 'n Daddy up," Tammy told him, but she dashed back downstairs immediately.

Marsh crawled out of his sleeping bag as Zephyr reached for his suitcase. They blinked at each other groggily for a brief moment (Zephyr didn't think he'd ever seen Marsh looking nearly that scruffy before) and then Marsh asked, "Why'd she want to see your feet?"

Zephyr's first instinct was to lie. It was generally a good idea not to share too much with one's co-workers. But he didn't have to be that uptight around Marsh, right? Marsh was his friend. Besides, the suitcase was just out of his reach, so he was going to have to get up anyway.

"Just another reminder of my mother's old heroin addiction," he explained as he slid one wedge-shaped foot to the floor.

"Holy... you only have three toes," Marsh whispered.

"Six, actually."

"Right."

Zephyr stood up and leaned over his suitcase. As he dug for his socks, he felt a wave of heat rush over him and noticed his hands shaking. He shouldn't have shown Marsh his feet. It wasn't the kind of thing one shared with co-workers. Marsh was going to tell someone, Oscar maybe, and Oscar would tell Mariluz, and pretty soon the entire office would be looking at him with that look of morbid curiosity.

Zephyr found a matching pair and sat back down on the bed. Marsh was still gawking. He slipped his feet back under the covers and struggled to put his socks on, although his hands were being extremely uncooperative. "It doesn't matter," he insisted without looking at Marsh. "What difference does it make how many toes I have? It's no big deal."

"Of course not," Marsh said. "It's nothing to be ashamed about, Zeph. Especially to me. I mean, we work with dozens of clients who make a couple of missing toes seem downright ordinary."

Well, there was that... and Zephyr had considered that angle before, which just made the issue that much more humiliating. "I know," he said, "but... I can't explain it."

"You don't have to. I think I get it. But you ought to know, it really isn't a big deal."

Zephyr succeeded in getting one sock on and started on the other.

"Is this why you ended up in the custom equipment industry?" Marsh asked.

Zephyr shrugged. "Nah. It's because Mr. Versiel gave me a job. Reg, too. In fact, I think he only hired me because he wanted Reg."

"Good ol' Versiel. He was a good man."

"Yah."

"Did you tell him about your feet?"

"Course not. I never told him anything. I have enough problems that are more obvious, like... well, you know."

Marsh paused. "I think so, but I'm not really sure. You mean that thing with your hands? Is it CP?"

"Nah. It's some neural disorder. I don't know what exactly and I don't want to. It's too late to do anything about it anyway." Zephyr smirked. "I manage. Though you know, maybe it was that shit that led to my career choice. I invented my first device when I was ten: a little vise grip type thing to help me grab stuff. Between that and making my own shoes, I guess I had some experience."

"You made those?" Marsh asked, motioning to Zephyr's pair of work shoes in the corner.

"I had to. It's impossible to find shoes that fit me."

"Nice. You do nice work. But you knew that already."

Zephyr managed a smile (as he simultaneously managed to get his second sock on - what a difference a little bit of relaxing made). "Thanks," he said.

"Feel better now?"

Zephyr shrugged. "Sure."

"Then shall we join all the action?"

Zephyr glanced at Reg, who had gotten as far as locating his suitcase and seemed to need help determining the next step. "I'll be there in a minute," he told Marsh. "Go on."

Marsh stood up, gathered his clothing for the day, and left the room. Zephyr scooted to the foot of the bed to help Reg choose the items he'd need. He wasn't entirely happy that Reg had been traipsing around in front of Marsh in just his underwear, but at least he'd been wearing something. Nudity didn't faze Reg one bit. The man had no shame. Zephyr envied him that.

Once he and Reg were presentable, Zephyr led him downstairs to the living room. Marsh was already there, fully dressed and shaved, and the Mueller relatives had returned. Marlone and Jack sat on the floor by the tree, baby Bryce perched on Marlone's lap. Toys, boxes, and chunks of colored paper littered every inch of the room, indicating that the opening of gifts had been going on for a while. Zephyr removed a Sit-n-Spin from the blue easy chair so he could sit down. Reg made himself comfortable cross-legged on the floor nearby.

Portia passed a large, odd-shaped gift to the couch where Marsh sat. "This is for you," she announced, "and this is for Zephyr and Reginald!" When Marsh had taken his gift, she shoved a large paper bag in Zephyr's direction.

"This one, too," Marlone said, offering another bag filled with presents.

Zephyr gawked. There must have been at least twenty items in the two bags! Most of them were wrapped, although there were a few gift bags interspersed. Zephyr took a box-shaped present and read the tag: "To Reg, from Marlone and Jack."

He passed it down to Reg, who carefully undid the tape and unfolded the iridescent green paper. Reg opened the box and pulled out two dress shirts.

"Shirts," he said.

"Doesn't he like them?" Marlone inquired. "If he's disappointed, I can..."

Zephyr interrupted her. "He's not disappointed. He's grateful. They're great. Thank you."

"Thank you," Reg repeated.

Zephyr took another gift, one with his name on it. He tried to peel off the paper without ripping it like Reg had done, but he couldn't get his finger under the piece of tape. He gave up and handed it to Reg to unwrap.

Reg winced painfully as the sound of ripping paper tore through the room. Damn, thought Zephyr, he'd forgotten to warn Marsh about Reg's sensitivity to that sound. But it was sure to happen several more times, so there wasn't much to be done about it.

Marsh's present was a large basket of assorted cheeses, crackers, and other food items. "Wow," he said. "You shouldn't have. I wasn't expecting anything."

"I figured you could use something to munch on while you're sitting around by yourself at home," Portia remarked with a wide grin.

Marsh looked at her perhaps a little too long. "Thanks."

"Thank you," Reg said.

Zephyr glanced down at him. The gift he'd handed him was a Dilbert desk calendar. "Hey, neat! Thanks, Mom!" Zephyr exclaimed as he traded Reg the calendar for another wrapped present.

Marlone smiled. "I didn't know if you liked that sort of thing, but I thought it was cute."

"Thank you," said Reg. Gotta love Reg and his catch phrases, Zephyr thought. And the timing for this one couldn't have been better. Good thing he'd given up on "Sorry, sorry," months ago.

Zephyr opened the gift bag presents himself, and together they unwrapped a veritable mountain of gifts. Most of them were from his mother, which in itself amazed him.

"I kept seeing things I thought you guys could use," she offered as explanation. For once, Zephyr wasn't complaining. They really did need most of the things she had given them. Once again, his mother was right.

However, Reg seemed to be at the very end of his stress tolerance (and the occasional screeching niece or nephew running by didn't help) so Zephyr put the gifts back into the bags and brought them and Reg upstairs. After making sure that Reg was comfortable on the bed, Zephyr dug around in his suitcase and took out an envelope, which he shoved into his pocket. He kissed Reg and returned to the living room.

Portia had moved into the kitchen to begin dinner preparations alone. Perfect, Zephyr thought. He joined her and leaned over her shoulder as she started a pot of water to boil on the stove.

"Hey, you," she giggled, spinning around and giving him a tight squeeze.

"Hey. Hey, uh, I'm not very good at toy shopping for the kids..."

"Oh, you did great. The kids love what you got them... although I'm going to have to get you back for giving Brit that archery set."

Zephyr grinned. "I figured she'd never get one of those from you. But there's something else." He pulled out the envelope. "I didn't want to give you this in front of everyone, and I didn't think it'd be a lot of fun to unwrap. Here."

Portia took it and opened it. "College fund," she read.

"There's one in there for each of them."

"$3,000... times four? That's..." Portia paused to do the math. "Twelve thousand dollars?!?"

"The bank let me put both Reg's and my own name on them, so both of us can add to them whenever we want. I can get your name added too, if you want."

"Jesus Holy Fucking Christ!" She gave a ear-splitting squeal and squeezed Zephyr again, even more enthusiastically. "Twelve thousand dollars! How can you afford it? You don't just have twelve thousand dollars lying around!"

"Actually..." Zephyr grinned. "We did sink a lot of our savings into the company, but not all of it. Think of this as an investment."

"It's like winning the fucking lottery!"

"Except you'll never see a cent."

Portia grew slightly more somber. "I know. But this is better. This is the opportunity I never had, and Dan neither. And you had to go out and make for yourself. All four of them'll have the opportunity to go to college." She gazed solemnly up into Zephyr's eyes. "Thank you so much. I love you, dude."

"I love you too, dude," Zephyr said as he embraced her in a long, clingy hug.

"And tell Reg-dude that I love him too."

"Oh, I don't know. You might have to tell him yourself."

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